Dear Women: Please Realize Your Self-Worth

I used to think that the saddest thing in a broken relationship was a man who couldn’t see his woman’s worth. But now my thinking has changed. Don’t get me wrong. A man who fails to realize or acknowledge his woman’s worth is pitiful. It’s absolutely saddening.

But there’s something worse. 

It dawned on my wife and I one night. We were talking about why women settle for a man that treats her like trash. How is it that she still desires to be with him? Why doesn’t she demand a change in his actions? Why does she allow the pain he’s caused to continually persist in her life?

It doesn’t make sense, does it?

Yet, many women still dwell in this sad reality — unable to break loose. Why is she bound? The sad truth is this:

self-worthSelf-worth. She doesn’t realize her own self-worth. Here’s how the dictionary defines self-worth:

the sense of one’s own value or worth as a person; self-esteem; self-respect.

Ladies, this may be hard for you to swallow, but in order to be treated well by a man, the first step you must take is to realize your own self-worth. You have to deem yourself as valuable. You have to deem yourself worthy of being treated well. You must have high self-esteem. And please, respect yourself. self-worth

Don’t wait on your man to do it for you. Because chances are: if you don’t see your worth, he won’t either (although that doesn’t give him an excuse to treat you bad).

Look in the mirror and say, I’m NOT:
– Ugly
– Worthless
– Stupid
– Unlovable

Whatever negativity you feel about yourself — cut it out. You’re none of the above. You just have to realize it.

Did you know…

That you have to demand your man’s respect? Let me explain. I don’t mean that you go and yell in his face, I demand that you respect me, or else!! That’s not going to get you very far. What I mean by demanding his respect is simply this: you get your man to respect you by the way you value and carry yourself.

Think about it.

If you don’t value yourself, you begin to settle for being treated with disrespect. Again, I’m not condoning or making any excuses for men who treat their woman badly. But the truth is, if self-respect isn’t there, he will most likely refrain from giving you the ultimate respect you deserve. Do you really think he’s going to treat you with high-esteem, if you’ve been settling for the sub-par treatment he’s been giving you all along? Psychology Today puts it like this:

You may even be willing to put up with behavior that doesn’t satisfy you, because you feel lucky to have anyone at all, even though you are aware you are not happy.

ReflexionFeature1Please stop settling. Stop looking at yourself through a broken reflection. It’s time to start looking at yourself through a clear reflection so that you can see your true beauty, value and worth.

Once you begin to realize how worthy you are — that’s when you’ll begin to carry yourself like a true woman. Once you begin to carry yourself like the valuable being you are — that’s when you’ll begin to silently and gracefully demand a man’s respect.

He won’t even know what hit him.

I can tell you first-hand. From the time my wife and I began dating, I always made sure I was conscious of never disrespecting her. Why would I take the energy to keep myself in check? Easy. It’s because of how she carried (and still carries) herself. See, I’m a nice guy. But nice guys are capable of making mistakes too. Because of how valuable my wife knows she is, I’m always making sure that I don’t do anything to disrespect her. I know she wouldn’t put up with disrespect, even if I tried it. I saw the value she see’s in herself, which made her that much more valuable to me!

Do you get it?

She demands my respect without ever verbally telling me to respect her.

There’s something about a woman’s presence when she values herself. It causes a man to respect her. Ladies, in all reality, men don’t like weak women. We want your self-worth to demand our respect. We just won’t tell you that. But guess what? I just let you in on the secret. So now, you don’t even have to figure it out. Now you just have to start valuing yourself.

To every women who doesn’t value herself enough, this is what you really are:

qualities-954789_1280Amazing. Smart. Beautiful. Creative. Inspiring. Strong. Radiant. Joyous. Delightful. Genuine. Unique.

Yes, you’re all these things and much more! Start believing it. Start claiming it. Start acting like it. Now go out and demand his respect. The right way.

Micheal Boyd

Micheal Boyd

Author & Blogger at Agape Her
Micheal is the owner and writer of Agape Her, where he publishes articles on marriage advice. His passion for marriage and writing inspires him to encourage husbands to love their wives unconditionally -- as God intended. Be sure to check out his awesome books! You can contact Micheal at:
Micheal Boyd

Micheal Boyd

Micheal is the owner and writer of Agape Her, where he publishes articles on marriage advice. His passion for marriage and writing inspires him to encourage husbands to love their wives unconditionally -- as God intended. Be sure to check out his awesome books! You can contact Micheal at:


  1. this post is amazing. you have really empowered me, hope to catch. a great guy like you ..

    • Hi Pearl,

      Thank you for your kind words. I’m glad my writing was able to empower you. If you’re continually aware of how great your worth is — the right guy is bound to find you! Just remember: never settle for anything less than great!
      God bless,

  2. I am so glad I found your article. It really lifted my self worth today and I will be aware of my self worth from now on. Thank you

  3. Now I’m aware of my self- worth, I know that I deserve better than what I been putting up with for many years. Today I can begin this new year knowing my self- worth. Thank you!…..

  4. Loved it thank you so very much for sharing this and helping me get back on the right set of tracks rather then the two that create a head on colision lol 😀

  5. Self worth says it all. We need it to find ourselves. Good job. would wish to read more of your articles

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