Stop Blaming Your Spouse — Maybe YOU’RE the Issue!

My 15 month old son has a new habit. Every time he wants to divert your attention to something, he sticks his little index finger out and points exactly where he wants you to look. It should come as no surprise that he often likes to point at people. No shame, no guilt. But, of course he doesn’t have any shame or guilt. He still doesn’t know that it’s rude to point at people.

As adults, we understand that it’s rude to point our finger at other people (at least in American culture). Why? Because pointing usually indicates that you’re talking about the person. In most cases if the person catches you pointing at them, they’ll perceive that you’re talking about them negatively.

Do you know where “pointing the finger” is especially common?

In marriage.

When things go wrong in marriage, husband and wife both love to “point the finger” at each other. The goal is to take “take the attention off of myself and divert it to my spouse,” or “let me put all the blame on you.”

Are you guilty of this?

Look at what Jesus has to say:

Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye. – Matthew 7:3-5 ESV

Have you considered that you’re the problem or at least part of the problem in your marriage? Before you go and “point the finger,” ensure that you’ve fixed yourself first.

Micheal Boyd
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Micheal Boyd

Author & Blogger at Agape Her
Micheal is the owner and writer of Agape Her, where he publishes articles on marriage advice. His passion for marriage and writing inspires him to encourage husbands to love their wives unconditionally -- as God intended. Be sure to check out his awesome books! You can contact Micheal at: micheal@agapeher.com
Micheal Boyd
Follow

Micheal Boyd

Micheal is the owner and writer of Agape Her, where he publishes articles on marriage advice. His passion for marriage and writing inspires him to encourage husbands to love their wives unconditionally -- as God intended. Be sure to check out his awesome books! You can contact Micheal at: micheal@agapeher.com

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