I recently wrote about husbands inevitably drifting away from being the man his wife once fell in love with. Fellas — if you want to be the man of her dreams again, I can help you get there. If not, then God bless your wife’s poor heart.
I thought up a simple way for every husband to win his wife’s happiness again. Back when Tia and I were dating, we decided to do something interesting. We each took a notebook and wrote down every quality that we adored about each other. I had a full list of traits that attracted me to her — and she had the same for me.
The lists were an eye-opener. Especially for me. Her list told me how incredible she thought I was and why.
Man of God.
These are just some of the qualities my wife loved about me. These are what attracted her to me. The list literally depicted the man of her dreams. Me. So if those same qualities remained in me, I would always remain qualified as this incredible man to her. But the moment I let some or all of these qualities go, was the moment that I became a complete stranger. Every day I have a choice: I can be the man of her dreams or I can be a stranger.
Fellas, when your wife met you, she may not have written down a list of qualities she loved about you. But she did internalize that list. Are you still the man she fell in love with? Or are you a stranger?
If you want to be the man of her dreams again, ask her for the “list.” Ask her to write down the qualities that initially attracted her to you.
What made her smile? What made her laugh? What gave her butterflies? What about you made her feel secure in you? What makes her melt on the inside? What gives her confidence in you? What makes her look at you and proudly say, “That’s MY man!”
Ask her to write down and give you this list. Once you have it, evaluate yourself. You may still be doing some thing on her list. Great. Other things you’ve probably wandered away from. Become the man on that list. The whole list. You’ve obviously been that man before. So you have no excuse as to why you can’t be that man now. That’s the man she fell in love with. That’s the man she wants you to be. That’s the man of her dreams.
Be that man.